SMELLS LIKE BULLSHIT

I don't know why but I am a complete stress monkey the last couple of days, I got into a screaming match with one of the only people I really like at work my clients are all illiterate fools who couldn't write a legitmate email that doesn't sound like a it was written by a third grade "special" child (Read fucking booger eating retard). And my sex drive is unusually higher then normal, which according to my girl is already out of control and she needs to turn the hose on me. It's like someone is secretly putting steroids in my corn flakes or something. You should have seen the size of my boner this morning! I swear to god it was enormous,(and yes generally it isn't near as big) I have no idea why I felt compelled to share that with you but hey like I said I'm a giant stress monkey.

I need to find a cool small bar for sale and just go back into the whole booze game. I know that I would be less stressed out if that was to happen, or if I hit the lottery, either way. here is a lovey cloud to help relieve the stress form the rest of the world...enjoy!

Please pray that I hit the lottery soon. I really need to find something else to do. I would like to spend most of my time traveling and hunting, and not have to worry about how in the world I’m going to afford the fucking cable bill. Not that I do that now but you know what I mean.

I would like to wake up one morning and just be like a cat. You know how they are dead to the world asleep and they open one eye and freak out and run into another room? Well I want to be able to do that but on a much grander scale. Like open one eye and freak out and run to another STATE, or even better another country. I hear it is pretty in Ireland (as long as you avoid Belfast..THANKS BONO!)

But seriously I need something like 200 bucks worth of fucking tune up on my ride, goddamned student loan people suck, I should have added them to my list yesterday, the rest of the bills and expenditures I have keeping me and Bouby fat and sassy, it takes quite a bit of my check to make that happen. Oh and the other thing I could do if I hit the lottery, find a bad Dr. who prescribes pain killers with no remorse. Not that I’m jonesing right now, I am not in a great deal of pain like 2 weeks ago, but since I live with more aches and pains daily, then most “healthy” people on the planet see in a life time, I wouldn’t mind the piece of mind that a full bottle of Vicodin gives you. Even if it just sits in the medicine cabinet and only gets used when the pain becomes more than I can handle…or the Raiders are losing, one or the other.

Oh and you can now add me to a long list of people who are getting/are annoyed at D-land and Andrew in particular. I still do not have my password to reclaim all of my shit, or to even be posting there. So until My hard drive gets returned and installed into this fucked up desk top and I can drag and drop stuff onto the server, I’m just going to have to stay here. Hey I like it it isn’t as bad as say prison….NOT that I would know about prison I’m just saying…

Today it is supposed to get in the UPPER 90’s. So if you are in the KC Metro area or even just in Middle Earth…(I like that better then Midwest) do not go outside for fear of spontaneous combustion. It is just like people in their upper 90’s, when they are outside you do not want to be out there with them. Just stay in the house and continue to molest your collie.

Well on the job front I heard back from my big Seattle Client yesterday. Of course it was just to clarify some points on our samples and price quotes, but at least he didn’t get everything and say “Ok these guys blow monkey balls” and not contact me at all. So I guess that is a good sign. I really just want to get this client because it would irk my CEO, because I didn’t invite him to go like I, and most of the other sales staff members generally do, because I have grown leery of his sales tactics. He reeks of desperation. And when meeting with clients you can’t reek of desperation, you must only smell of success and cologne.

So what are the winning lottery numbers for today? If everyone gives me 6 numbers I will pick the ones that come up most often, and I will play that ticket and anyone who participates will get a share of the winnings. Lets be Psychic together!!.

Oh and here is another picture of the Terminator robot.

Well I am here for a while, maybe for ever, but since I killed my lap top and failed to write my password down for D-land I can't post over there. So I guess I will have to see how this one works and I might have to do some sort of web magic and make this look more like home.

Ok Pete tagged me on this excercise and I will try and not get to far off of the beaten path with my ranting.


1) I don’t get why there is traffic. Why don’t more people loose their fears or stay at home! The fucking little old bats behind the wheel during rush hours in the left lane AKA the fast lane doing 10-15 miles an hour below the speed limit, why isn’t there a law in place that gives me the right NAY,,,the pleasure of pushing these retarded AARP crusty fucks off of my highways and by-ways? Please for the love of god stop me before I kill again. This is why there are no cars in Japan, they respect their old people enough to not let them get behind a wheel of a car.

2) What is the deal with traffic circles? I fucking hate these round about wheels of death. I was on the air in Manhattan KS, when the town fathers decided to put 3 of these fucking things in. so I moved to California. Ok not the only reason but it was a good enough one for me to not move back there and to take up residence in KC. These ass hammers didn’t even put them in logical places, one was on a residential street that was so narrow that the students who lived on that street couldn’t get moving trucks in or out so they could move away from college. The fucking fire trucks in Manhapenis KS had standing orders to drive over the top of the these things fucking up the 1000’s of dollars of landscaping they insisted in putting in because they were to fucking big to make the turn. Personally I don’t want to watch all of my shit and possibly all of my neighbors shit go up in flames because some asshat wants to appear more fucking European! Stupid cocksuckers!!

3) I don’t get spending any amount of money on ANY 4 cylinder car to make it sound like a margarita blender with a stuck blade. Anyone who watches Fast and Furious and thinks “wow that is so cool, I want to look like a dork and make my car run the ¼ mile in 10 seconds is dumber then both movies put together. You might as well race skateboards! My 72 Plymouth Satellite 4 DOOR!! Could turn a 12 second ¼ and that was with no additions to the car except 50 lbs of old McDonalds hamburger wrappers in the back seat. (That was back when they had that absurd deal where hamburgers were like .20 ea, and Me and “C” decided to see how full we could get my back seat) But anyway, you noisy cricket car driving dork squads, are wasting my oxygen, get off of my planet! Your civic will never be ass cool as a true muscle car straight outta Detroit!

4)I don’t know where they find these people for reality TV. It has gone the way of Jerry Springer. For fucks sake people! If I have to see one more fucktard break down crying because someone was mean and hurtful to them while they are trying to take a shortcut to greater wealth and happiness, I will go on a tri-state killing spree! It pisses me off to see my quality Gilmore Girls TV programming sucked up by some inane contest to see who can fuck over the other guy better/longer/dumber and than that person gets rewarded. You want reality fucking TV send a camera crew to my Dad’s house and watch a 73 yr old man run a puppy mill because his social security check doesn’t cover his bills, and his medicade is getting cut back because he is as healthy as a horse. Fuck all of those people trying to beat the system with a get rich quick, so I’ll make an ass out of myself on TV for 6-12 weeks. Just play the lottery if you want to get rich quick at least this way our schools and Veterans get a little something from the state kick backs.

5) Organized religion. Do I really need to go here? Sheep being lead by the nose to the slaughter house by a wolf in cheap clothing. I make no apologies for my opinions, I know that I am the minority here, but really if you need someone to tell you to behave or he’ll fucking spank you and send your internal being to hell for eternity, you are a sheep. I’m sorry I just don’t think that that is that way it is supposed to go down. Use the bible as a guide and not a way of life and you will be more happy. And if you are using the bible as a way of life, stop forcing your beliefs on others. Just because not everyone has interpreted that book in the same way you have. Remember the Spanish Inquisition was not a nice walk in the park discussing theology.

Now if they will participate:

Trashman

Bouby

Webmiztris

GB at Death’s Door

Ruksack…I know he generally doesn’t go in for this kind of tomfoolery but I would like to know more about his persona via what drives him loopy!

Boyd Coddington Sr. At the SEMA show in Las Vegas last year.

I didn't take this one but I came across it on the web somewhere and it looked sooo much like my friend Kim I had to borrow it.

Bloodhound pups

Little Pup

Beagles

Old Homestead

Seattle Docks

Donnie

ice

This unfortunate soul lives on the streets of Seattle. He had just finished making and eating a sandwich.

Weird Sculpture

Cat's ass

2 Birds one shot spring 2005

Toxic Irish Food...Not really it is a great place to eat.

Grand master J and the Garden hosers

St. Louis at Night

The Girls

My Blue Bouby

I took this during a storm and all of the bright spots are falling rain reflecting the flash back at me.

Treasure Island, Las Vegas

Different Dt. Coke

Cinny

When Cells Collide

Diet coke..caffine free