Friday, July 14, 2006


WAR...and stuff

Apparently John Stewart thinks that we are heading intro world war 3.

I think that is an excellent idea. I feel that it is high time that we do something to stop the overpopulation of mother Earth. That and I figure I will be one of the last people standing and it will give me an opportunity to devise a government based solely on what I think is right and wrong.

Like first thing…no lawyers. They just gum up the system like cheese in a colon. Next, capital punishment for all capital crimes, rape, murder, child molestation and child abuse. And I do know the difference between abuse and discipline. None of this “spanking is abuse” That is bullshit. Every action has consequences, and the kids need to learn that early on.

Drinking age 16, driving age 21, smoking? To each his own if you don’t like it stand somewhere else, Freedom of speech on whatever media outlet we have left…radio? You are now completely uncensored, if you want to say the seven dirty words on air, go right fucking ahead.

Newspapers, you better have all of the facts right BEFORE you take a story to press if not you get jail time.

Drugs, all legal. AND taxed, because if you are too stupid to moderate your drug use to become a upstanding citizen in your community then you get to be fucked up all of the time, and when you OD we’ll put you into the crematorium and scatter your remains on my rose bushes so at least in death you will do some good.

Welfare? NO FUCKING WAY! I’ll go all John Smith on people. You don’t work you don’t eat! Get a fucking job or get off of my planet. And making baby criminals is not a job.

Oh and to have kids there will be a written and psychological exam. Be prepared, if you fail you will be sterilized.

Clothing- Optional, but if you get frostbite, or sunburn on your junk, then you are too dumb to be on my planet too.

Doctors- they get paid teachers salaries, and teachers get Dr. salaries. It is far harder to teach kids then it is to keep them alive.

Anyway I hope the war in the middle east escalates and we blow ourselves back to single cell organisms.

Well as long as all of my friends and family and their friends and families are safe and sound. Because as you know we can’t have a war without causalities and I would hate to think any of my friends and their families would be hurt or killed in a war just so I could run a government. I mean really how selfish is that?

On a completely different note I had to spend (put on Bouby’s Credit card) $250.00 worth of contacts and glasses yesterday, and my vision is failing slowly but surely every year. Both of my eyes are degrading at the same rate at least so I don’t have to try and keep my contacts separate, but 3 years ago my script was 2.50 in each eye and yesterday they got bumped to 3.0. There was a 2.75 in there from last year, but ½ a degree in 3 years is a pretty good sign that I’m getting old.

I can’t wait until my 40th Birthday. I am going to have a big assed party with cake and booze and Van Halen opening for Jimmy Buffett, and naked hot tubing, porn, guns, fire trucks, fireworks and fist fights. Everyone is invited. But since that is a year away I think I’m going to set up a paypal account so you can donate to the party fund….Buffett isn’t cheap, and even though Van Halen will probably play for beer money it is going to take some fast talking to get Eddie and Dave on the same stage, I think as the worlds greatest salesman I think I can make that happen.

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