Saturday, October 15, 2005


Dream Weaver....

I was tossing and turning all night. It was a typical night of ½ sleeping and weird dreams but there was only one that was powerful enough for me to remember it. So all of you arm chair psychologists and dream analyzers tell me what the fuck is going on.

I’m driving a Volvo, wait there is more, and I have packed it with everything I own and am driving across country. I don’t know which direction I’m driving but I think it was east because of the people I meet.

I pull into this gas station that appears to be crowded but there is a lot of people just standing around. I really don’t notice that until I get into the store and pick out what I need and head to the cahier station. I ask the teenager behind the counter a direction question and she looks at me with those vacant teen eyes, and says” Eet Don’t matter now how, you’ll be right back.”

I just stare back at her for a couple of seconds and then head out the door, where I see a kid that was like 10-11 years old holding a sign like a bum that read “ a place for a cig and a beer” Like that was all he would ever need to to be happy…I start to walk back to where my car was parked and I hear a guy tell the kid to just give it up it ain’t gonna happen, when I notice my car, well more to the point I notice it’s not there. I look around for a few seconds and my mind processes that there are a lot of people and no cars.

The people were separated from the cars with a series of poles and some rope like a redneck style of velvet rope. And I see the back end of my car in line with the others I also notice that there are some people in the crowd holding signs with numbers on them like auction paddles, but in my dream I feel that these are “waiting to be helped numbers”. It was then that I see a guy on the inside of the ropes and he is walking around trying to look like his in charge. All of the people shy away from him and that helps his bad ass ego inflate. I call to him at the same time as a black guy, who is standing just a bit in front of me, does. He ignores the black guy and walks up to me and asks “what the fuck do you want?” I get right in his face and ask real threateningly to please go help the black guy first, since he had clearly been waiting longer .

So he looks at me with a pseudo confused look on his mug but he does it, I can’t hear what they are saying but I se the black guy start nodding and hen walk away. This hillbilly walks up to me and asks” Yer satisfied now I take it” I reply “Yes, I am , Now did you Tow my car?
HB – Yeah I did!
Me- Well I want it back
HB – Well you cain’t have it.
Me- What gives you the right to tow all of these peoples cars and not let them leave?
HB- I’s got one of them dollar bill things and it says right on there that I can do this!
Me-???WHAT?? Fuck you it does not! At this time I crawl under the ropes and it seems that no one in the crowd had thought to do that yet of if they did they were intimidated enough to go back under and to wait patiently for their cars. I’m neither of those traits, Patience and easily intimidated….not me.
HB- Git yer ass on the other side of the rope!
ME-Or what?
HB- I’ll kick your ass
Me- You feeling froggy ? Jump mother fucker!
HB- you think I’m doing wrong why don’t you call the cops?
Me- Yeah I will but I won’t call the law in this town I’m calling the state troopers and maybe the DA from (I think I said Washington, but I’m not sure) The man paled at this suggestion. I could see his bravado getting smaller the more I talked.
HB-But you cain’t do that, I got one of them dollar bills…..
Me- I think what you got is a nice racket selling these stolen cars back to their owners and your using the money for compound up in the mountains where you spout religious rhetoric like that guy in Waco Texas.
HB-(Eyes bugging out of his head, getting physically smaller as his ego is battered) I’m just building a home for my family, and all of their families!
Me- Bullshit! You’re trying to be like David Koresh and what you need to do is to stop worrying about that dollar and start worrying about your eternal soul burning in the hells of fire and brimstone.

At this time he had shrunk to the size of your average math teacher and was laying in a ball on the ground, he looked at me like I was the devil himself and he started running for his car and he sped off. I turned to say something to the crowd…….

And the fucking TV came on!

We use it as our alarm clock and it is such a pain to reset it I just turn it off by hand or get up. Since this is Saturday and I was planning on sleeping in, this weird assed dream compelled me to get up, and write it down.

So what the fuck does it all mean? Ask your friends and family members, because I think this is my calling to gather the masses and wage war on stupidity.

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