Monday, September 12, 2005
The NFL and you...
Well I don’t know if anyone signed up for that elimination pool I was going on about last week sometime, but I put me and Bouby in it and yes I know 42 dollars down the drain…almost! There was a spectacular game on yesterday that wiped out 36.83% of the people playing. JUST ONE GAME!! I know it is crazy!! There was 113 people signed up for this pool and after the very first week more the ½ are gone!! All you had to do was pick A winner. Just one. No scores, no spreads, no over/under, just the winner of one game.
I didn’t get it right either.
So I’m out. I picked St. Louis with the rest of the 36.83% of the people playing in this pool. Bouby picked Washington Redskins, she is still in. Oh and the winner gets $2260.00. So now instead of it being 2 chances out of 113, it is a more manageable 1 out of 46 chance of winning. And depending on the picking skills of my Bouby, we could go all the way to the bank!!
The Rams played the 49’ers, the 49’ers were the worst team in football last year. The were abysmal! 2-15 on the year. They one twice all year. Who would have thought they wouldn’t be still “rebuilding”?...Well apparently the remaining 46 people.
Anyway the weekend was spent watching football and doing COSTCO! Love the bulk shopping, When I was single I would do most of my shopping there, well I still do, but when I was single I also tried to make as much eye contact with the women shopping there as well. You know so we could discuss the size of my cucumber and stuff. Well I came to a real quick conclusion. You can not pick up a woman while BULK shopping! They are all married or very very very scary. Single guys bulk shopping are just adhering to the “guy’s rules of shopping”
1. Get in buy a lot and leave
2. If it is worth buying, it is worth buying a lot of at one time preferably in one big box.
3. Nothing says manly like a BALE of toilet paper.
4. Two words: Cheap – Liquor
Women however that shop at Costco, they are generally herding a gaggle of kids, and are on a mission. List out, head down, maneuvering the giant cart with the precision of the space shuttle docking to MIR. They don’t want to chat it up about the size of anyone’s cucumber , they just know that they have to get the shopping done, pick up Billy at soccer practice, get home start dinner, close on the Jensen’s place, finish dinner, help slay with her math homework, and ride Daddyo’s barely adequate wiener for the 3.25 minutes it takes to put a smile on his face only to leave her unsatisfied and tired, so she can do it all over again the next day.
I just quit shopping with women on my mind after I figured this all out. However this didn’t stop the women from hitting on me! Even when I’m with my Bouby, I get hit on.
Saturday we were walking through Costco, and this beautiful bronze goddess walked right up to us and flashed me an award winning smile. Her gorgeous dark brown curls bounced lightly as she sauntered past us, I looked at Bouby and she smiled at me. I was a little taken aback but then again she has a deep seated respect for the fact that I am a seriously handsome man and she takes solace in the FACT that she and no other holds the key to my heart.
As we continued our shopping I would catch a glimpse of this beauty, as she peeked at me from the corner of her eyes, or from around the goods stacked in the aisle. She couldn’t take her eyes off of me, Bouby told me that too;
Bouby: “She is watching you”
Me: “What can I say, I have this effect on a lot of women”
B: “ I know you do How do you think you got a stunner like me?”
M: “You don’t have to tell me that I know that”
As we were finishing up our shopping excursion I caught one last peek of this curly dark haired beauty as she peeked her beautiful brown eyes from around her mothers face and gave me one last fleeting smile.
She was 2 going on 16. One more heartbreaker in the making.
You didn’t really think that MY Bouby would stand for a WOMAN flirting with me like that do you? She would throw down a serious ass kicking if someone older then 16 hits on me!
And here is some more puppy pics!
I didn’t get it right either.
So I’m out. I picked St. Louis with the rest of the 36.83% of the people playing in this pool. Bouby picked Washington Redskins, she is still in. Oh and the winner gets $2260.00. So now instead of it being 2 chances out of 113, it is a more manageable 1 out of 46 chance of winning. And depending on the picking skills of my Bouby, we could go all the way to the bank!!
The Rams played the 49’ers, the 49’ers were the worst team in football last year. The were abysmal! 2-15 on the year. They one twice all year. Who would have thought they wouldn’t be still “rebuilding”?...Well apparently the remaining 46 people.
Anyway the weekend was spent watching football and doing COSTCO! Love the bulk shopping, When I was single I would do most of my shopping there, well I still do, but when I was single I also tried to make as much eye contact with the women shopping there as well. You know so we could discuss the size of my cucumber and stuff. Well I came to a real quick conclusion. You can not pick up a woman while BULK shopping! They are all married or very very very scary. Single guys bulk shopping are just adhering to the “guy’s rules of shopping”
1. Get in buy a lot and leave
2. If it is worth buying, it is worth buying a lot of at one time preferably in one big box.
3. Nothing says manly like a BALE of toilet paper.
4. Two words: Cheap – Liquor
Women however that shop at Costco, they are generally herding a gaggle of kids, and are on a mission. List out, head down, maneuvering the giant cart with the precision of the space shuttle docking to MIR. They don’t want to chat it up about the size of anyone’s cucumber , they just know that they have to get the shopping done, pick up Billy at soccer practice, get home start dinner, close on the Jensen’s place, finish dinner, help slay with her math homework, and ride Daddyo’s barely adequate wiener for the 3.25 minutes it takes to put a smile on his face only to leave her unsatisfied and tired, so she can do it all over again the next day.
I just quit shopping with women on my mind after I figured this all out. However this didn’t stop the women from hitting on me! Even when I’m with my Bouby, I get hit on.
Saturday we were walking through Costco, and this beautiful bronze goddess walked right up to us and flashed me an award winning smile. Her gorgeous dark brown curls bounced lightly as she sauntered past us, I looked at Bouby and she smiled at me. I was a little taken aback but then again she has a deep seated respect for the fact that I am a seriously handsome man and she takes solace in the FACT that she and no other holds the key to my heart.
As we continued our shopping I would catch a glimpse of this beauty, as she peeked at me from the corner of her eyes, or from around the goods stacked in the aisle. She couldn’t take her eyes off of me, Bouby told me that too;
Bouby: “She is watching you”
Me: “What can I say, I have this effect on a lot of women”
B: “ I know you do How do you think you got a stunner like me?”
M: “You don’t have to tell me that I know that”
As we were finishing up our shopping excursion I caught one last peek of this curly dark haired beauty as she peeked her beautiful brown eyes from around her mothers face and gave me one last fleeting smile.
She was 2 going on 16. One more heartbreaker in the making.
You didn’t really think that MY Bouby would stand for a WOMAN flirting with me like that do you? She would throw down a serious ass kicking if someone older then 16 hits on me!
And here is some more puppy pics!
