Tuesday, July 05, 2005


4th of July...summers almost gone


4th of July weekend! What is better then a nationally sanctioned holiday that allows average Americans to blow shit up?!! What could be better huh? Well unless you are the owner of a skittish dog with a nervous stomach, who’s ass turns into a shit sprinkler system and covers the living room with an even coat of doggie discharge. Then the whole weekend is pretty much just a babysitting mission.

We (Bouby and I) went down to PetCo on Saturday Afternoon and bought a kennel for Cinny. She is deathly afraid of any loud noises and tends to try and hide in the back of the closet, or under the bed. Both places she wouldn’t fit unless she was a puppy, and she’s not she is a 8 year old 65 pound ½ rottie ½ chow. So I guess if you want to risk breaking into my house just bring some fire crackers. Well with the exception of the 135 pound Rottie that also lives there and thinks fireworks are fun to play with she might eat you but with all of my buried pirate treasure hidden in the walls of the house, it might be a good haul.

On Saturday I was suckered into yet another “Watch rednecks drive in circles” contest. We have a potential new client who is the sponsor of the NASCAR Truck Series, and so we went out as a “sales team” event to show them how excited we were to have the possibility to be working with them building their new traveling exhibit. So I went out there thinking that we would be gone for just a couple of hours and that we wouldn’t actually sit through or for that matter even go into the race and sit in the blistering sun and get ours ears blown out because our seats were 4 rows up from the death and noise of souped up trucks. Nor would we be subjected to the teeming masses of sweaty rednecks who seem to think that what they’re watching is actually worth getting in fist fights and defending the honor of their favorite driver.

We even had the pleasure of sitting behind a guy who “Booed” several of the drivers during the introductions. Classy. So after being out there for 5 hours and about 10 laps of ear splitting noise in circles, I turned to my British companion and yelled in his ear “THEY ARE STILL GOING IN A CIRCLE” He understood and we left. I have now been at every style of race they hold at the Kansas Speed way. IRL, NASCAR, and NASCAR Truck series, I lost interest in watching cars go in circles when my AMF track broke when I was 11, it is more pointless then the ground acquisition games that I enjoy watching from the comfort of my living room, not to mention being subjected to the elements and the stupidity that is a NASCAR event. You want to make it more interesting for me? Take away all of the safety features and let them go at it 70’s style when the crashes were less frequent and the driving better, but when they did crash it was awesome!! Lots of explosions, people dying in the stands…a larger sense of adventure, not just the corporate money grubbing pseudo-sport it has turned into.

I should have stayed home and jerked off. Wouldn’t have lasted so long and I would have had an excellent time!

Then the weekend was pretty uneventful. Lost a couple of hundred bucks at the boats, went to Costco, got drunk, listened to our neighbors spend every last dime they had in the kids college fund on fireworks, and I started a new book. All in all it was a pretty good weekend. And to paraphrase Ice Cube “ I didn’t have to use my AK, it was a good day”….

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